May 25, 2010

Consternation reigns following the publication of a scientific study purporting to demonstrate that women are better than men at telling people where to go.

The controversial findings were first published in the Journal of Pragmatics (previously best known as a minor character in the works of acclaimed French authors Goscinny and Uderzo) and subsequently popularised by national newspaper The Daily Telegraph.

Despite what the LibToryGraph describes as “women’s woeful reputation on the road,” it seems they are better than males at giving verbal directions to passing motorists.

One tentative explanation for women’s superior performance in tests is that they like talking and will sometimes even think about what they are saying before they say it.

Men were far more ready to offer estimates of distance – but usually wrong. Women were less keen to estimate, but better at it – supporting the theory that men will just say the first that comes in to their heads particularly to strangers who they’ll probably never see again anyway.

“Women,” the Telegraph reports, “were more likely to take their time over giving directions, with twice as many as the men “pausing significantly” and even talking to themselves out loud as they went through the route.”

But for male readers feeling undermined by evidence of ladies’ superior direction-giving prowess, the online edition of The Telegraph offers links to the following reassuring stories:

– Half a million road crashes caused by women drivers applying make-up

– Women and gay men are worst drivers

– Woman driver caught flossing teeth at 70mph on motorway

– Women worse at parking


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