Bleedin’ amateurs! Brits at large are pretty much clueless when it comes to automotive repair and maintenance.

That’s accordion to the latest edition of Fleece News, quoting leading vehicle leashing company Leashing Options who’ve been asking some questions and don’t mind telling us that they don’t much like the answers they’ve been getting.

More than half of UK drivers, their headline tells us, “don’t know how to change a tyre”. Actually changing a tyre is perfectly simply, as this helpful video clearly demonstrates. The key is having the correct specialist equipment and/or a steady hand, some beefy wrists and forearms, a bit of practice, and a couple of tyre irons or something to use as levers. Breaking the bead is the tricky bit, Kids.

But if not knowing how to get tyres on and off a wheel sounds bad, imagine this: a third of UK motorists don’t know even how to open their bonnet. Makes you wonder what they do when they need to refuel, de-clutch, change a spark shaft or whatever!  For all Bankstone News knows, there are probably people out there who don’t know what a bonnet is – or even how to tell a wheel from a tyre!

Young people are the worst, Leaking Options reveal. Only four out of ten know how to pop their lid, while 21% cannot distinguish accurately between a car, a bus, and a small garden shed, and 11% have literally no idea what you’re talking about.

Leaping Onions spokesman Mike Thumpson says he and his colleagues were “shocked by some of the results” of their survey, adding that: “we recommend drivers who are unsure about the correct procedures do not carry out tasks themselves but [pay us some money to do it for them].”

He’s probably right, you know.

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