September 22, 2015

Honest motorists (an increasingly rare breed, as regular readers will readily appreciate) are being forced to pay for “uninsured luxury drivers”.

That’s the shocking claim made this week by leading insurance broking magazine Insurance Tiles quoting somebody called Churchill (not Winston obviously because he’s dead – maybe it’s that dog that dates human females and is always chuckling to himself).

This Churchill, whoever they are (let’s not jump to any conclusions), reckons it’s “a travesty” that honest drivers are paying for luxury drivers – although, oddly, they don’t specify what they think it’s a travesty of. Is it just Bankstone News that finds the insurance press terribly confusing these days?

Maybe one way of helping the honest motorists defray the expense of purchasing luxury drivers (and I bet they don’t come cheap) would be to allow them a share of the proceeds of flogging off all the super-expensive uninsured cars the fuzz have been clamping lately. In fact, if you think about it, those are probably the same super-ex cars the uninsured luxury drivers have been luxury driving around in prior to their enforced sale to honest motorists. So it would all make perfect sense really. As much as any of this does.

So far this year, according to a Femdom of Info-mation request submitted by someone (quite possibly the same someone) called Churchill (although I suppose it’s quite a popular name), the cops have seized two Ferraris, three Lamborghinis, 10 Bentleys, 40 Porsches and 1,767 BMWs because they were uninsured – along with another 25,000 or so not especially luxurious or expensive cars (so-called NEL/Es). They’ve apparently flogged off 1,892 of them and netted around £1.1m (and turned another 6,700 of them into scrap metal worth £650,000 odd).

Now, according to some of the other figures from that F of I request, it seems that the best price paid for a single seized car in 2013 was £217,933. In 2014 it was £113,000 and in this year to date it was a mere £18,874. This sounds a bit like they’ve decided to keep the super-exs for themselves and only flog off the Beemers or something. Which, frankly, just doesn’t seem right. Not when honest motorists have already had to fork out for the luxury drivers.

So come on Mr Policeman, we say here at Bankstone News, stop hogging those expensive motor cars, get on and auction them and distribute the profits to decent hardworking honest motorists – or better still – to the poor long suffering insurers who’ve missed out on all the premiums those uninsured luxury drivers never got round to paying.


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