July 22, 2011

People driving too slowly and/or at the designated speed limit are causing havoc on Britian’s roads. Almost half (45%) of us apparently feel obliged to dice with death in a reckless attempt to get beyond such idle dawdlers.

New research from confuse.com has revealed that six out of ten motorists become stressed and irritable when confronted with “a vehicle driving slower than the rest of the traffic.”

Leaving aside the question of whether it is the vehicle or its driver who is driving, it seems only reasonable to suppose that –until such time as we’re all formed up into computer controlled traffic trains moving at a single constant speed – some cars will always be moving slower than others. Hence 60% of us are eternally doomed – except when on the loneliest roads – to near-constant stress and irritation. No wonder we are continually colliding with one another, impelled, no doubt, by pure and unabated rage.

Separate research by the Department for Transport suggests that so-called Sunday drivers directly cause precisely 143 accidents a year. But time may well be running out for the elderly, uncertain, ruminative, stoned, or just plain sight-seeing individuals who blight the UK’s highways with their inadequate vitesse.

Half of British motorists apparently support confusing.com’s genius brainwave of imposing minimum speed limits UK-wide and cracking down hard on those who fail to observe them. This should be easy enough. Traffic cop car chases involving such offenders would doubtless be of limited duration. Officers running or cycling alongside the worst offenders could even hand out on-the-spot fines.

Confuse.com also found overwhelming support for the idea of installing a nationwide network ‘slow speed cameras’ to capture offenders on film and send out automatic fines. Roadside signs could also flash up warnings such as: Increase speed now!

Confuse.com spokesman Gaz Klot claims “Slow drivers are a constant source of anxiety on UK roads and responsible for a large amount of accidents each year. We support the introduction of a programme of measures to eliminate this hazard.”

Fifteen per cent of confuse.com’s survey respondents supported the idea of allowing slow drivers on the roads only at certain dedicated times of day.

Five per cent thought it would be a good idea for slow drivers to be obliged to display a special badge to warn other drivers. Alternatively, Bankstone News supposes, they could just be required to place a straw Panama hat on their rear parcel shelves. Others, however, felt that a badge might just have a red-rag-to-bull effect on more speed-inclined drivers and exacerbate the stress / irritability / rash overtaking problem.

Depends how the stickers are worded, probably.



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