August 26, 2016

Essex man Calvin Lumbago thought he could could save himself a few bob by driving without insurance. He was wrong!

For anyone who’s still in doubt as to how seriously the forces of law and order take the issue of driving without motor insurance, his story offers a sternly instructive example.

In future, let us be absolutely clear, uninsured drivers will have quite literally nowhere to hide. Zero tolerance is the name of the game now, with rapid response choppers summarily scrambled to track down suspected insurance dodgers wherever they may be.

The many thousands whose livelihoods quite literally depend on healthy sales of motor insurance will have derived considerable satisfaction from reading a story in this week’s edition of leading industry journal Insurance Types entitled “Police helicopter catches insurance fraudster.”

Because, let’s be absolutely clear, again, not having valid insurance is fraud, the very worst and vilest kind of fraud there is!

Under the heading “How the police tracked down insurance dodger”, Insurance Tights explained exactly how the bust went down. It was a misty monday morning early doors when Cheatin’ Calvin and an accomplice were out crusin’ in their non-legit whip.

Before they knew what had hit them, Po-Po’s Fed-Tech ANPR cams had clocked them riding bareback. Cue: flashing lights, siren, and high-speed chase through the notorious badlands of North Kent. If Lumbago thought he could circumvent capture by fleeing on foot, he could quite literally not have been wronger.

Quick-thinking officers immediately called up a cop-chopper, whose heat-seeking cameras rapidly zoned in on the dodger’s fugitive body flare, tracking the blighter’s flight to a nearby copse, where they soon had him safely restrained and detained.

Now he’s been slapped with a rap of driving a motor vehicle without insurance and will soon be hauled up before the dreaded Medway Magistrates, who’ll probably sentence him to something pretty darned salutary.

Let that be a lesson!

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