It’s easily done, but Bankstone News is a bit confused by recent announcements concerning proposed increases to the small clams limit for personally injured clams.

First it seemed the limit would be going up to £5,000 across the board, which is simple enough even for Bankstone News to understand.

But now, in announcing a bumper package of fun packed legislation rejoicing under the title of the Prisons and Courts Bill 2016-17, the MoJ appears to be saying that the limit is going up to £5k for whiplash claims – but only up to £2k for other kinds of PI claims.

Hold on a second though, we thought. Isn’t whiplash an entirely fictitious thing? A thing, in other words, that doesn’t actually exist. How can you increase the small clams limit for something with no verifiable tenure in the realm of the real?

Perhaps, then, it is a real thing after all. In which case, it’s a real thing with which lawyers won’t be having much to do in the traditional way, and this could have some alarming implications for even decent ordinary motorists.

If it’s a real thing, it could happen to you, not just to evil sponging layabouts hellbent on putting up your insurance premium. And if it did happen to you, the implications would be roughly as follows (assuming Bankstone News has – and we recognise this is a pretty bold assumption – got hold of roughly the right end of the stick – or at least, let’s say, somewhere in the middle of the stick, closer to the right end than the wrong end, maybe):

  • You can’t afford a lawyer (unless you’re so stupidly rich you probably wouldn’t bother claiming anyway) (have you seen the tariff – it’s hardly worth it, honestly)
  • You could choose to clog up the courts (and learn a whole new language) by representing yourself in court
  • You could ask your Uncle MacKenzie or one of his ‘friends’ to offer a few helpful pointers and maybe come along to court with you (small charge may apply)
  • You could give up and go away (officially recommended option)
  • You could take out some kind of insurance policy now that will fund a proper lawyer (www.properlawyersRus.co.uk) if and when you decide you may have have been affected by New Real Whiplash

But how would you find out about new WhipBTE insurance? Don’t worry, you’ll soon be bombarded by calls about this and all manner of fancy new responses to the government’s brave attempts to help insurers soften the blow of Ogden, rising repair costs etc. by cutting a guaranteed £40 (ono) off your massively increased annual insurance policy.

As Rugby Onion Footballing so eloquently attests, it’s amazing the fun you can have just by changing the rules of a game every ten minutes.

Mercifully, the prospect of driverless cars for all (and a potential end to all this tomfoolery) looms not too far off in the future, prompting many to wonder: are we nearly there yet?

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