At 9am sharp-ish tomorrow morning a raggle-taggle convoy of medievally clad persons mounted upon monkeybikes will depart Bankstone’s Brighouse HQ, their sacred mission to waste an entire weekend traipsing around various more or less ruinous historic landmarks the length and breadth of Yorkshiremanshire in aid of lifesaving airborne charity YAA.

Kenny Garment of YAA will be there in person to wave them off, fortified, as they will be, with industrial quantities of bacon roll from local catering establishment Angie’s Café. There’ll be a sumptuous lunch at Kirkham Priory, a lavish tea at Sheriff Hutton Castle, plus all the beer you can drink and a slap-up curry at overnight stop Wetherby. That aside, Day One will be nothing but unremitting (albeit) scenic monkeybiking grind.

Day Two will probably be even tougher. Although there will doubtless be a hearty Full English in Wetherby, some sandwiches and chocolate bars along the way, and a splendid al fresco midday meal at Castle Bolton – plus a bit of getting lost, mechanical failure, hungover groaning, torrential downpours, mutinous breakaways, tearful breakdowns, brake failures, breakups etc etc.

If you want to know where exactly the Medieval Monkeys charity knight riders will be going, you could try reading last week’s story, with accompanying map, although we’ve now decided not to risk another attempt at finding the mysteriously located Pickering Castle and plumped for the aforementioned Kirkham instead.

Next week’s Bankstone News will include a blow by blow account of the whole disastrous adventure, in the meantime, kindly go to www.justgiving.com/medievalmonkeys and make a sizable online donation to this most excellent of causes. Abusive accompanying messages welcome.

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Mr Tyson’s new costume for this year’s event.

 

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