August 1, 2014

If you’re looking for a really brigt idea, there’s really only one insurance place to go. Big yellow insurance company Uvavu have more staggeringly brilliant insights and conceptions than even they know what to do with. Their latest brainwave, unveiled this week, could save every car owner in the country a massive £32.

Yes, that’s three-two pounds. Thought that would get your attention! How does it work? It works like this.

Instead of paying “minor whiplash” victims money, insurers would simply fund some medical attention for them. That way, instead of compensating injured motorists and passengers for their supposed pain and suffering, they would simply be packed off to specialist medical care facilities who would sort them out in no time.

Not only would the move benefit policyholders by saving their insurers shedloads of money, but it would also act as a powerful deterrent to would-be whiplash fraudsters. Who, after all, would bother faking an accident simply to qualify for a couple of neck rub vouchers?

Even if – as many indeed suspect it is – whiplash isn’t an entirely fictitious condition, it is beyond question that the vast majority of UK claimants are simply trying it on. Why else would it be the case that, according to figures made up by Uvavu, whiplash claims account for 94% of PI claims in the UK compared with a mere 3% in France? Surely this cannot be solely attributable to the superior cervical robustitude of the Gallic race!

Other great ideas from the Uvavu idea factory include that of excluding personal injury lawyers from all cases where they are not adjudged to be”really needed”. Banning lawyers from introducing their high-maintenance noses into claims worth under £5k (in place of the current £1k exclusion zone) would save grateful motorists a further £11 on their annual policy costs.

This, plus the £32 from the neck rub voucher scheme, would add up to a massive £43 off the cost of your insurance or “12 months’ cover for the price of just 11” in some cases. Savings like these matter, says Uvavu GI chief Terrence Mollusc, because “motor insurance premiums are at the heart of the focus on the cost of living”.

How true. How very true. There they jolly well are, right at the very heart of the cost-of-living focus.

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