January 13, 2012

Following a regrettable breakdown in negotiations between Bankstone News and its prospective outsourced content providers in Bangalore (see last week’s issue for details), we have reluctantly decided to continue writing these stories ourselves.

One way or another, however, we are grimly determined to spend less time churning out this nonsense and more on the fruit machine down the Badger Baiter’s Arms. On which note – following last week’s well-received contribution on the topic of Motorcycle Sales from guest reporter Andrew McNonymous – we are delighted to announce that Bankstone News has a new semi-regular correspondent coming on board in the shape of noted test drive reviewer Marty Butch (pictured below).

Each week Marty will be taking and driving away a different vehicle and putting it through its paces to see – both literally and figuratively – exactly what its made of. Occasionally he’ll scribble his barely decipherable thoughts on the back of the oval bit from a box of Kleenex and fax it over to us so we can bring it to you through the magic of Interweb. Welcome aboard, Marty. We know it is going to be a blast!

In other Bankstone news this week, we can exclusively reveal that we are currently hard at work on a brand new Bankstone website. This will not only look lovely but also have steak of the heart new functionality like Broker Washboards that will look a bit like all those dials behind your steering wheel and show Bankstone’s valued clients various bits of vital management information in 24/7 real time. We are planning to unveil the new site sometime during Q1 2012 (so mid-2013 at the latest, probably).

Forthcoming highlights in Bankstone’s Razzle Page-a-Day Planner include a trip for Dickon Tysoe to the I Love Clams networking lunch on 20 January hosted by Fifth Gear presenter Tuff Needle and Formula One presenter Jack Humphries, where “celebrity hosts” RSA will have to be careful not to be seen talking to any public enemy parasites like credit hires firms etc (see the War on Credit Hire).

A little further up the road – but no less exciting for that – the weekend of 7-8 July sees the welcome return of Bankstone’s round-Yorkshire fancy dress fundraising monkeybike run, Medieval Monkeys. That means you have just six months left to click on the thingy to the left and get last year’s total up to 100% before it all kicks off again.

Better still – get yourself a ridiculous costume (fantastic deals on Monkey Bikes coming to these pages shortly, if you’re short of one of those) and join us as we stage a scintillating succession of breakdowns, comfort breaks and running repair stops round some of the UK’s most scenic roads and charming historic landmarks.


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