Are you planning to visit France this year? Really? Why on earth would you do that? Well, if you absolutely insist, you should know that driving around without a breathalyser (or kit self-alcotest, comme en dit en Français) in your voiture, could land you dans l’ordure profonde.

Bizarre as it may seem – not content with insisting that we lug around an objet à trois cornes de sécurité, a gilet pas très à la mode mais de haute visibilité, and assiettes de la Grande-Bretagne – those bloomin’ Froggies are now demanding that we carry (and use) our own personal kits test de l’haleine to check whether we’ve accidentally inhaled near a cork or something and gone over the risibly low French drink-driving limit (limite de boire-conduite).

Dog-food-to-driving-advice provider IAMs warned this week that, from 1 Juilet, carrying a breath test kit in your car will be compulsory (de rigueur) and that, from Novembre, failure to produce your kit when challenged will attract a massive €11 fine. The good news is that such kits can be had (peut être eu) at the ferry or tunnel terminus (terminus) for £2 or less. You’ll need at least couple (un couple) – parce que what if you use the only one you have and then they stop you?

Does the breath test law apply to bikers too, Bankstone News wondered. IAMs have promised to look into it and get back to us. We’ve also asked “can a high protein diet affect my pet’s behaviour” and “how can I tell if my pet is too fat or too thin”, and we’ll update you on the answers to those queries too in due course.

Dans les temps avares, Bankstone News vous conseille de ne pas conduire même un peu quand vous avez eu quelques!

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